Monday, August 22, 2011
Another disastrous date or maybe not
Okay, my friend decided after my last disastrous date with P.I Sean, that I was on a streak of bad luck with men. Oh really, ya think? Oh, l'umanità di tutto!
Soooo, her little brave soul decided I needed to meet her brother’s friend. I said no blind dates. The last was with Clark. No self respecting Italian mother names her kid, Clark! And the date was as stupid as his name. This time, I wanted e-mails. Yes, I was going, the let’s get to know each other on-line, where we can really lie through our teeth, because we can’t see each other, and use model pictures to cover up the lack of exercise for months, no let’s say years, route.
Girlfriend assured me, he wouldn’t lie to me and he was in great shape. Uno può sperare solo! Oh, yeah, prove it. How well do you know this guy? Or did you meet him at your parents when he dropped by to watch football with said brother, who is a big loser. Still, with all this, it didn’t detour me from wanting to have a computer between us on the first official meet. I had heard all about computer dating, or meeting and decided it was time to experience it. As long as it didn’t include a police report, I was there.
So our communication went on for a couple weeks, until, computer-guy asked me to meet for drinks after work. Again at an Italian restaurant! What’s with these guys taking an Italian to Italian restaurants!? Come on, it’s NYC! I think there are a couple other types of eateries. Really, just a few, I’m sure we can find something, that doesn’t serve what I eat every Sunday.
But I digress, I meet him at the same place P.I Sean dragged me out of, to chase a cheating husband he was paid to catch cheating! The place does get great reviews. I was hoping to actually be able to taste my mushroom ravioli’s this time.
We met, and hey, he looked just like his picture. I prodigi di volontà mai fermano! Really, just like it. A bit of a exaggeration on his height. I'm taller then him. A little frumpy around the edges. He's a computer geek, so it comes with the job title. But not bad. I still think we're off to a good start. We do the air kiss thingy, and shake hands, and exchange DNA in that instant, because he was dripping wet, with sweat. Yep, he’s just a bit nervous. Just a bit, I keep telling myself. It’s hot outside, its stuffy in the bar, but not like we’re sweltering in Texas.
I get a table for us, because the bar is crowded. I had gone to the restroom which passes the kitchen, and dropped in to say a few things to the chef. We conversed in Italian. Ka Bow, we get a table. Computer-guy is impressed. I really needed to be able to hear computer-guy talk, since he wouldn’t look at me. I think I had a giant hair growing out of my forehead or wart on my nose. So yes, I cheated to jump ahead on the wait list. Sorry, but not really.
But-that’s where it ends. I try everything to get computer-guy out of his shell. I tell him about the tire incident, the battery incident, Nona and my brother’s wedding, chasing the dog down the street with knife incident. I decided to leave out my ex left me for a man, situation, TMI at that point. He’s pushing his campanili around on his plate, and nodding and smiling. Okay, I’m laughing, by myself. Not working, I'm rapidly running out of incidents and police reports.
We end the date, more air kisses. He puts me in a cab. He's pretty impressed with the address I gave the cabbie. I do have to remind computer-guy, I'm from Jersey, like that would make a difference on the outcome of the date. Anyhoo, I go to Henry’s down a bottle of wine, and whine about computer-guy and men in general. The wine was a bad idea, had to go to work the next day.
Since then I get regular e-mails from computer-guy. It’s kind of cool. I can meet up with him, without make-up, in my pj’s, eating my left over mushroom ravioli, typing with my mouth full, there is no exchange of DNA. And just think no man-dribbles on my toilet seat because he didn’t lift it! Amare esso!!
Vederla sul retro