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Friday, April 29, 2011

BulletProof Hearts by Kay Thomas

I read this book to distract me from my Nona’s driving as we race through the Holland Tunnel to my brother’s fiancés bridal shower in SoHo. I needed the distraction from certain death, as Nona changed lanes, cursing in Italian at those who, OMG, dared to honk at her insanity, all the while giving them ‘the finger’ Italian style, with a hand jester from under the chin, holding a cigarette with ashes flying in all directions, as my mom tried to rip the rollers from her hair, tease it up, plastering it into place with hairspray, which potentially could have turned us into a fireball.  I wanted to take the subway, but I was out voted by one, Nona. My decision to go along with the females of the family in Nona’s 1990 Voyager van, was regrettable as soon as we hit the tunnel as me, my sisters and cousins prayed, crossed ourselves, and hoped we’d make it out alive, at the same time my sister Lucinda argues with cousin Connie, about what else, a guy. I might add a guy not worth salt.

We arrived in SoHo, luckily not in a blaze of glory, with Lucinda and Connie calling a truce to the battle, at least until we take the same trip home, only this time with Nona’s driving enhanced with a few glasses of wine. My brother claims his fiancé’s family LOVES him. They may not, after they meet Nona and this poise. 

Oh, but I digress, back to the book, that I read as I was jostled between Lucinda and Connie.

I liked Abby the heroine and Shaun of course was to die for, but the story was a bit predictable. Heroine’s brother is murdered by his boss, who wants his secrets, hero is hired to protect heroine, and find the secret code, hero and heroine escape certain death as gun fire erupts right after dead brother’s funeral. They escape together of course, and end up in bed in a nice little B&B on their escape route. Oh, and the heroine discovers the secret code doesn’t tell hero, who has his own secrets about continuing to talk to the evil boss. This proves to be very destructive to all. As predictable as this is, I have to say I liked it. Abby was a feisty little southern bell, who was very smart, and Shaun well, he’s Irish, and I know all about those dudes.

After a wild ride home, as I predicted, just as scary as the first, I finished the book, as I lay on the couch of my nice quiet apartment, with only James T. Parakeet chirping away. Ah the silence, is golden. Great read!

I would have given it a six for a subway read if I was able to take the subway, but it got a #7, for the Holland Tunnel and Nona’s driving.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Cop appeal, by Ava Meyers

I read this at the gym on the  treadmill. Not something I advice, it's a bit too hot to pay attention to what you're doing, which I'll explain.

I got to sex scene, which there was many, like every other page, all the time. There was so much sex, it exhausted me. I couldn't finish my workout. When I got to the threesome, I tripped, fell to my knees, and rolled off the back of the treadmill, right into the path of Firemen Frank. Who helped me up, and handed me my Kindle. For days I thought maybe he glanced at the scene and read it, because he kept giving me this wicked grin every time he saw me. I decided it was just gas. He did mention he ate at my cousin's deli, which always does a job on me.

I digress, I'm not sure what I thought of this little read. It's  one very hot little tamale. It goes beyond erotica.  It was only 60 something pages long, enough to occupy me on the treadmill for two days, and land me at the feet of the hunk of the season, Firemen Frank. This is a story that is suppose to be about hot cops. Yes, the cops are hot and the girl in question, Sarah, was well, pretty weak, especially since she went along with a weird quirky threesome. Sarah dumped Luke the cop, four years prior, for another cop, Richard, who she married, claiming she didn't love him, but loved Luke, yet she still married Richard. Doesn't make sense. The reason why,was never made clear.

Sarah divorced Richard, because he was abusive. That made sense.  Sarah's self-esteem is so low, she should include the cost of therapy in her divorce settlement. So after four years, Luke appears on her doorstep, and manipulates her into a threesome with his cop buddy, within 24hrs.

There's that self-esteem issue again. It just seemed too easy, which makes Luke a really good manipulator. Coming from a family of cops, that too made sense. This guy Luke is actually really talented, beyond anything I've ever seen. It helped that the other cop was a hunk, that certainly would ease my shock for about two seconds. Even with that, I'd kick them both out on their behinds.But the book isn't about me, but is about them. Thank goodness.

This was a fast moving story, well written, and it did keep me occupied on the treadmill, and earned me a few gasy grins from Firemen Frank. I'll have to talk to my cousin about the potato salad.

My two brothers and my dad are NYPD, and it literally blinds me, I do mean really blinds me to imagine them in a threesome with their cop buddies. Per l'amore di Dio, sono cieco!

Still it earned a #5, because it not only kept me coming back for more, (not sure why, but it turned into a little addicting read), but it kept me on the treadmill, burning up calories from my over indulgence during lunch. 

Monday, April 25, 2011

Scent of Diamonds, by Dorothy Ann Skarles

As I cleaned my apartment, I came across the brochures for a vacation in Mexico that my ex-boyfriend and I were going to take this spring. That all ended when he left me for another guy. Yep, you heard it folks, another `guy', as in the male species, complete with all the hardware. If I had the brochures in my hot little hand, when he dropped that bomb about being confused about his sexuality, I would have gladly enhanced that confusion, by stuffing the brochures right up the wazoo.

What does a self-respecting Jersey girl do? She puts the brochures on the bottom of the bird cage for James T. Parakeet. As I put the tray back and watched my little green friend let one fly, I got to thinking about Mexico. I'm imaging going with someone, tall dark and handsome, like Firemen Frank at the gym. Yo, Frank, ya free! While I gave this some consideration, I noticed that James T. Parakeet really did a number all over the brochure with its sunny bright blue skies, and swaying palm trees now peppered with bird poop, as he happily chirped away.

I digress, so I went in search of book that is set in Mexico. I've never been there and wanted to at least, for a little while escape Jersey.

What I found was a Scent of Diamonds, and it was on sale for 99cents. Since I'm saving to go anywhere, I decided to go the deal route.

The story was full of twist and turns as Tyla, the heroine, is given two prayer books that unbeknownst to her contain the formula to make real diamonds, which has some real colorful bad guys trying to get it from her. Tyla was a fun and spunky heroine that made me want to be her, besides when she was in a Mexican jail. I won't give the ending away, but it's a great one, and held me captive through the rest of cleaning of the apartment on a chilly Saturday afternoon.

I give big #9, because to finish it I hid in the broom closet at work. It's a big, Lei deve leggere questo libro!

Friday, April 22, 2011

Lying Eyes, by Amy Atwell

I read this book after a blindingly bad blind date. My mother set up this date, hence the attraction to the name. Already you know it's bad when a mom is involved. One of her oldest and favorite customers from her hair salon for years has been trying to get me to go out with her son, Clark. Now, what self-respecting Italian mother from Jersey would name her son Clark!? Which is why it's taken me years get together with 'Clark'.

Clark picked me up in his brother's car, something he let slip, along with, his still living with mom, because he's chronically unemployed. The key word here is chronic. He had enough hair product in his hair, that it weighted his head down, which caused his neck to disappear. Which tangled his over zealous group of gold chains to squish together and hang to his belly button.

We went to his cousin's pizza parlor, because he gets free pizza and beer and watched basketball on the flat screen, because he doesn't have cable in his bedroom and his dad hates basketball. Oh, did I mention he doesn't own a flat screen, but a 1970's little tube that if he had cable wouldn't work anyways. A real catch. Oh, yeah, another slip.

Oh, but I digress, when Clark dropped me off at my front door. I really wish I met up with him at the pizza parlor, so he wouldn't know where I lived, but yo, here we are. I had to fight off his octopus arms and get into my door and lock it up like Fort Knox. So I went to this little book, got a glass of wine, turned on the late show, and read. I laughed out loud, which is always a good thing, and loved the rabbit. Kincaid was a babe and guy we'd all love to find, unfortunately, I didn't have that on my blind date. I've never been to Sin City, but would love to, just to see how the other half lives. Loved the characters and really forgot about my bad blind date, until the morning when Clark called to see if I wanted to do it all over again. Uh, no.

Pick up this book and you won't be disappointed. This is this author's first book, at least that's what it sound like from the other reviews.

Great first start for a bad blind date. I finished it up on the subway on the way to work, so it's made the subway read at #6...

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Vampire Mine by Kerrelyn Sparks

I like to read while I'm on the treadmill at my gym. And since my boyfriend dumped me for another man, it's been a place I find myself more often. I always put that little clippy thing on my shirt, because I've tripped more than once, at least that will put on the emergency break. And it will keep me safe from getting tossed back into the hunk behind me, who runs at least 100 mph.

He looks it too. His name is Frank, and he's a FDNY. Yummmy! Come and save me sometime, Frank, when my apartment is on fire. Oh, that wouldn't work, I'm in Jersey.

Anyhoo, now that I'm newly single, with those long empty moments, that my ex-boyfriend occupied, I'm going back to the gym with my Kindle in hand, to read on the treadmill. It's amazing what you see when everyone thinks you're just reading. Did you know how much men like to look at their own ass in the mirror!? A lot, way a lot. But not Frank, he's a real cutie, with a great ass.

Sigh, I digress, this book became my treadmill read this week. I've never read this author, and I understand this is a series? Well, it was entertaining, not enough to keep my eyes totally off of Frank. That would be one hell of book if it did. Back to the book, I liked this Scottish Vampire, at least he's not Italian, they've been getting a lot of bad press since Anne Rice. Anyhoo, again, I've read the other reviews, and I guess Connor keeps getting crankier with each read. Well, he's pretty darn cranky in my opinion. He's in competition with my cousin Vinny in that department. Who if I didn't know better, I'd believe was a vampire. I think the angel, is well, way too good for him. There were some really funny moments, that caused me to laugh out loud and spew water threw my nose, in front of Frank, as I tried to be cool on the treadmill. I did like how Connor softened towards the Angel, whose name escapes me right now.

So I do recommend it as a great treadmill read so it lands a #5. It occupied me, kept me walking at a good pace, and from being bored to death with ESPN on the ALL the televisions.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Briefly Yours, by Madison Martin

This is my hang-over read, since it distracted me from the throbbing in my head. After a bad break-up, what do I do, but go out with my girls. Okay, I can't even remember how I got home, and whose dress I was wearing when I woke up in the morning, because I didn't leave wearing red, but sure came home in a some little red number, that is cute, a bit tight, but not mine.

Since I had to spend the afternoon, with family at my Nona's, for Sunday dinner after mass, I needed something to keep me occupied and out of the usual complaints of my mother about my father, and why I'm not married yet. So I downloaded this on the Kindle and escaped to sit on the back stoop, reading during all the fury over sauce.

It was a sexy little read. I loved the relationship between Justin and Ava.

Ava is feisty and I soooo much want to be her, with Justin in the picture of course. Reading has become my world, besides waking up in dresses that aren't mine, making this a great fine.

I digress, this is labeled erotic, and yeah it was, and the characters relationship is based on all that hot steamy attraction. So if you don't like a lot of hot sex, well this might not before you. But it is for me! At least right now. If only all relationships were so sexy, then maybe I'd be happier or sexually healthier.

The story was entertaining, and occupied me while everyone battled, and before I had to sit down for dinner and answer all those questions about what happened to my latest relationship and why he's not at dinner. Hell, he's not at dinner or in my life!! I also had to endure the looks from my soon to be new sister-in-law, who clearly has no idea what she's getting into by marrying a Russo.

Back to the book, it gave me something to read as Nona gave me the evil eye, and kept committing in Italian, and I quote, Ché aspetto voi? Non sposato alla vostra età.
It's as bad as it sounds.

This is a easy read. I read it in a afternoon, through the haze of a hangover, bewilderment over a very little red dress and Nona's cranky expressions.

I gave it #5, because it's good. Perfect for a afternoon on the stoop, in between the rain.  It almost made it to the treadmill. 

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Tempting Adam By Jill James

I came across Jill James book, during a moment of temporary insanity, so I'll call it my break-up read. What attracted me was the title, Tempting Adam. I was blurred eyed, crying like a fool, eyes fat with tears, stumbling around my apartment in a stupor, because my boyfriend, oh, that's a correction, my just newly ex-boyfriend had dumped me for his boss. That's not a miss spelling. He dumped me for his boss, who's a guy.So you can understand my sudden interest in a book with the title Tempting Adam!

My roommate had me locked and chained in our apartment to keep me from transforming into a werewolf, and doing something that, I'd really really regret. Maybe not regret, but would land me in jail for life. To appease my sense of injustice, what else was there to do, but surf Amazon looking for something to read and download on the Kindle Adam gave me for my birthday. I trashed everything else he gave me, by tossing his carp out the car window as I drove down the Jersey Turnpike, near the Western Spur southbound ramp. Watch out for debris in the roadway. The Kindle was saved because it was the best gift he ever gave me, and I can't afford to replace it.

I digress, so back to the book. The setting is Hollywood, a far cry from Jersey. I've never been to Hollywood, and this took me into a different world, where Adam was a really good guy, and better looking than my Adam, oops, my ex-Adam. At first I didn't like Yvette Giardino,  but she redeem herself (I had to forgive her, that's a good Italian name). I still had some hate for her throughout the story, because she's too pretty to like. There's a crazy half-sister that makes my sisters look like sweet little darlings. My eyes dried up, and I stopped feeling sorry for myself, and was so engrossed in the story, and the hot sex scenes, I forgot about my ex. Hopefully this tiny moment of delight will last, at least until tomorrow, or maybe the next day.

I guess this is where I recommend the book. I recommend it as a great break-up read and on my rating system I give it a big #8.

It distracted me from my howling stomping pity party and the fact I was dumped for a guy. If only there were more guys in real life like Adam St. Eden. Love the name.