BulletProof Hearts by Kay Thomas

I read this book to distract me from my Nona’s driving as we race through the Holland Tunnel to my brother’s fiancés bridal shower in SoHo. I needed the distraction from certain death, as Nona changed lanes, cursing in Italian at those who, OMG, dared to honk at her insanity, all the while giving them ‘the finger’ Italian style, with a hand jester from under the chin, holding a cigarette with ashes flying in all directions, as my mom tried to rip the rollers from her hair, tease it up, plastering it into place with hairspray, which potentially could have turned us into a fireball.  I wanted to take the subway, but I was out voted by one, Nona. My decision to go along with the females of the family in Nona’s 1990 Voyager van, was regrettable as soon as we hit the tunnel as me, my sisters and cousins prayed, crossed ourselves, and hoped we’d make it out alive, at the same time my sister Lucinda argues with cousin Connie, about what else, a guy. I might add a guy not worth salt.

We arrived in SoHo, luckily not in a blaze of glory, with Lucinda and Connie calling a truce to the battle, at least until we take the same trip home, only this time with Nona’s driving enhanced with a few glasses of wine. My brother claims his fiancé’s family LOVES him. They may not, after they meet Nona and this poise. 

  

Oh, but I digress, back to the book, that I read as I was jostled between Lucinda and Connie.

I liked Abby the heroine and Shaun of course was to die for, but the story was a bit predictable. Heroine’s brother is murdered by his boss, who wants his secrets, hero is hired to protect heroine, and find the secret code, hero and heroine escape certain death as gun fire erupts right after dead brother’s funeral. They escape together of course, and end up in bed in a nice little B&B on their escape route. Oh, and the heroine discovers the secret code doesn’t tell hero, who has his own secrets about continuing to talk to the evil boss. This proves to be very destructive to all. As predictable as this is, I have to say I liked it. Abby was a feisty little southern bell, who was very smart, and Shaun well, he’s Irish, and I know all about those dudes.

After a wild ride home, as I predicted, just as scary as the first, I finished the book, as I lay on the couch of my nice quiet apartment, with only James T. Parakeet chirping away. Ah the silence, is golden. Great read!

I would have given it a six for a subway read if I was able to take the subway, but it got a #7, for the Holland Tunnel and Nona’s driving.